Loosing my mind just to find a place in your mind.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

i'm pissed off. kind of + i'm hurt. yeah that's it. Well, i'm sry if some words weren't pleasing at all. yeah okay .

HK was awfully bad coz...

There, his live less body laid right in front of my very eyes & all that flooded my mind was those memories so happy in the past. yes, the past. The tears never stopped whenever i saw his body in that room with a glass door. the atmosphere was uncontrollably sad & what hurts the most was when his body was in the coffin, giving us the chance to see him one last time before he was sent to the crimation centre. it sucks... it sucks to have to accept the fact that he has passed, he isn't coming back, he isn;t having dinner/lunch with us anymore. why ... coz he left before i had the chance to say good bye. i feel so sorry for not spending enough time with him every december. i feel sorry that till now, only had a couple of photos taken with him. whatever it is, it' reality already & nothing's gonna change it. well, maybe all that i can do now, is to fulfill grand dad's one last wish. i love you grand dad & i hope you'll be able to see this coz i never had the chance to say this to you. i know it sounds wierd but, i felt grand dad's presence ytd in HK ... i felt that every thing was normal, he hasn't left. yeah...

Maybe, i need to a break from accepting the reality. *hmm.

Ange, nessa : i miss you fucking hell much & i cant wait to see you tmr!

I have to go back to school tmr...

Sucks

YAs reality is crashing to the floor.

Paint a portrait of you & I-;

~~You get older & blame becomes to shame.~~
Would you still love me if i was spastic, crazy, mad or...whatever?

I love starbucks with bestfriends. i love my family, bestfriends, friends & i love my boyfriend.

I'd love to experience everything in life. Try whatever seems crazily fun or stupid.

I don't live life to the fullest sometimes but to me, life seems like a movie. Everything happens so fast, ends so fast but at the same time, there're so many people in life that you treasure & never want to leave. i've never been perfect in my life. never once. i've never done anything exceptionally good however, i've got the perfect friends in life. i've got a beautiful boyfriend & i thank God for everything i've came pass.

I can be very crude, retarded & stupid at times.

I'm a mean bitch, whore, cunt whatever you want to call me if you make my blood boil. I wouldn't acknowledge you on the streets if you did something to insult my friends & i. Infact, i'll probably hate you for life for what you did. Yes, very much HATE.

Chains;

Tender Words-;